Teens 13+

Digital residents live and play online. They need access to the Internet for educational, employment, and social activities. Teens will have unsupervised access to the Internet, but they are still learning and need SUPPORT from adults and mentors to make good choices about what they access and share. It’s important to build trust with teens so they feel comfortable communicating about what they see, hear, and do online.

Preteens and teens will come across explicit online. They may even seek it out.

Even if this content is restricted at home, they can access it while at friend’s or relative’s homes. It’s an uncomfortable topic, but it’s important to talk to your teens about porn and other forms of explicit content. You can help them set realistic expectations about sex and intimate relationships. 

You will not be able to police every moment a teen spends online. It’s impossible. This is why it’s important to build trust.

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Use this guide to navigate this tough conversation.
  • Explain Why Porn in Harmful

When you talk to your teen about porn, include these key points

  • Porn is made to make money – the actors in the videos or photos are paid.
  • People like to watch things that they don’t do in real life. Porn lets them enjoy these fantasies without having to do them.
  • Porn is exaggerated. It’s not like sex in real life.
  • No one asks for permission or if it’s okay to touch someone, have sex, or do other actions in porn, but it’s very important to ask permission in real life.
  • Actors are being paid to pretend to enjoy what they are doing, even if they don’t like it.
  • Everyday bodies don’t look like the ones shown in porn. The actors in porn are like models in magazines.
  • Just because people are aggressive or violent in porn doesn’t mean this is normal or acceptable. Sex needs to be respectful and consensual .
  • Listen & Answer Questions

This can be an uncomfortable conversation to have with a teen. Try out some of these questions to get the ball rolling.

  • Does anyone you know talk about porn or claim to watch it?
  • Have you ever watched porn?
  • Have you ever watched porn with your friends?
  • Do you have any questions about things you’ve seen?
  • Regular Porn Viewing

If a teen or pre-teen is regularly looking at porn, it’s important to find out why. If they’re looking at it to find out more about sex, you can provide them with better sources of information.

If the teen is looking at porn for sexual arousal, ask them how often and what kind of porn they are watching. It is vital you explain why regular porn use can be harmful.

However, if the teen feels like they can’t control their pornography use, you can find additional resources here